Surely, That Is What Love Is
I was watching a movie the other day, titled “She is the man.” I have seen the movie a lot of times, for the singular reason that it is comedic and sometimes, you just want to relax, put your legs up and laugh.
The world is stressful enough, and a few laughs here and there really help.
Now, just in case you are wondering, this article is not about how the movie made me laugh. There is something awesome about life that when you study something repeatedly, you are bound to find out that you missed something cogent initially.
For those of you who have not seen the movie, let me give you a run down.
A lady who was so bent on playing football (soccer, considering it was shot in America) pretended to be her twin brother so she could play in her brother’s new school. Her brother, on the other hand, was not interested in school. He sneaked to London for his music. It was a boarding school, and her brother was supposed to be attending for the first time.
Their parents were divorced so she simply lied to her mother that she was going to stay with her dad.
Basically, it was easy to pretend to be him.
And the movie was centered around her having to act like a guy.
Now you can see how the movie can be hilarious.
However, I noted something I had previously not taken note of.
When she got to the school, she befriended three boys, among whom was a black guy. Now, this black guy liked one funny-looking girl in braces in the school, but he could not tell his friends because he knew they were going to laugh at him.
There was a scene where they were given lab partners and he felt bad that his friend ended up with her. But when the friend made jokes about how he didn’t want to be her lab partner, he had to join in so they don’t notice how he felt.
Luckily for him, he ended up with the lady at the end of the movie.
But it got me thinking about how many people have lost the love of their lives because of their friends.
It got me wondering about how many people turned their back on real love that would keep them happy forever because they knew their friends would not approve.
It makes me wonder the number of times we have turned down the people right for us, just because of our friends.
I wish we were nicer to people, so we don’t have to pretend not to like someone.
I wish we bothered more about what is in someone’s heart than how someone looks, so we do not feel compelled to hide our feelings.
I wish that content was regarded more important than container.
I wish we were strong and bold enough to be ourselves and like who we like, no matter what our friends think.
It is a sad situation. Really! This innate desire of man to want to fit in, that we compromise on things we know are good for us because the people around us do not have the same understanding.
I wish we were stronger, but the truth is that most of us are not that strong to do it anyway.
That is why I think we should be sympathetic to ourselves and not give our friends or family grief over inconsequential things, just because it would not work for us.
You don’t like the girl in braces? No problem!
You don’t like geeks? That’s okay!
You don’t like short men or women? Cool!
You don’t like big girls? Alright!
You don’t like skinny girls? Great!
But can you please allow your friends and family like them in peace? Can you understand that the fact that you are not attracted to someone like that does not mean your friend cannot?
Can you understand that indeed there are different strokes for different folks, and we are all wired differently?
Can we try not to be the reason the people we claim to love, miss out on the best thing that could ever happen to them?
This cuts across all situations of life and not simply as it concerns relationships. Live and let live.
As far as the reason we disapprove is superficial and trivial, then we should let people live with their choice and support them through it all.
Surely, that is what love is!