There might be other issues in the future that some of us are going to need exorcism for in order to comprehend and acknowledge, but I suppose this one doesn’t. Someone once said that “you know you’re in love when you can’t fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams”. This affirms to the notion that love is a beautiful thing, and to be loved genuinely is the best gift any woman could ever ask for.
Although, all this is true, I got to acknowledge that I feel awkward and nervous at the thought that maybe I might not be able to find my own Mr Right. The thoughts that constantly flood my mind are coercing me to question whether I will be able to find that man who will love me, understand, accept and make me feel like that special person that I am. My case is however not exceptional, I know there are other women out there who are highly depressed because of that thought. While others have already lost themselves doing things they perceived would help them land the right man. But all in vain and I tell you, that’s absurd!
Dating these days seems to have become ambiguous and confusing. I have observed and also experienced one-sided relationships. I was however, brave enough to leave it all behind me, simply because I felt the relationship was the complete opposite to what I wanted. To put it mildly, it was draining. To be quite frank, it felt like flogging a dead horse, absolute lunacy! It is unfortunate though, that many women find leaving a relationship that is not working or not showing signs of improvement not so easy. They fear that they might become lonely and miserable. There’s so much truth in that. I personally also fear not being able to find a man who is as committed and focused as I am, but letting someone drain you emotionally because they don’t understand your worth is not an option. You don’t want to be stuck with someone who is busy chasing the wind. You got to let go, because when purpose is not known, abuse is inevitable!
I applaud those who have found love, those who are happily married because it’s so wonderful to find someone who wants to spend the rest of their lives with you. But poor me and those other women who can relate to my story, we’re slowly getting tired of our situation, doubt also is slowly taking centre stage in our lives. What has prompted me to miserably type this blog, is the savage comments I have been coming across lately, and I’m sure some of you have encountered them too. How do you respond to “when are you getting married”, whilst you know there isn’t a Mr Right who committed to taking things further? This is very stressful, it puts an unmarried woman under pressure. When you’re under pressure, it’s easy to lose focus, your goals and yourself in the process. Imagine how much savage perceptions and comments can impact negatively on one’s day to day life. Relatives, classmates and even friends at some point throw that question at you, leaving you falling apart inside without their knowledge. We are social beings, that’s the unfortunate part and people talk about these things openly. Pretending as if you don’t care can be good, but truth is – every single woman wants to be loved, and wishes to meet Mr Right at some point in life. I however, stand to be corrected. That’s just my line of thought!
In an African society, if a woman reaches a certain age without some sort of attachment to a man, she is labelled unfortunate. But I beg to differ, I don’t see myself as unfortunate and I didn’t write this to draw some sympathy from people. I also don’t belong to any pity party and never will I. I think that I am a successful story especially introspecting from where I’m coming from and all the challenges I have had to conquer to maintain my sanity, staying true to myself and slaying my goals with so much hardwork and focus. In a nutshell, I still believe in finding Mr Right, I still believe in true love and marriage. I would also want to be honest, if that doesn’t happen, it’s still okay. That will not take away the fact that I’m an amazing, intelligent and hardworking woman. I therefore, challenge all single women out there not to feel less because they haven’t found their Mr Right. Be confident, remain focused and good luck finding the love of your life.
You all are amazing!