We want everything but can we have it all?

We want to be career women, wives and mothers. A little bit like Beyoncé who is one of the most successful female artists in the world and finds time to be a devoted mother to Blue Ivy and wife to Jay-Z.

We want to have amazing jobs, be in love, have big houses, glamorous cars, travel around the world. We want it all.

Are women wrong to ask for a hectic and accomplished life at the same time?

Traditionally, a woman was supposed to stay home, raise children, keep house and take care of her husband. However, in recent decades, more women are combining everything and attempting to excel in every area in their lives.  We want to work and have children, look after our families and at the same time travel around the world. But is it feasible?

For me, this is trying to set goals which cannot be achieved and this could expose us to inevitable disappointments. At the same time, I also believe in the saying that goes ‘the bigger you dream, the bigger the achievement will be’. Dilemma.

I do not see myself being content with being just a housewife, it just isn’t me. I must admit that this has some negative consequences because I am missing a lot of steps and wow moments in my son’s life, but that is my choice and it should be respected. Whether I am happy with this arrangement or not, is something I am yet to determine. The only thing I can say for sure is that if you are happy and fulfilled as a woman, you’re more likely to make those around you happy be it your children, husband, family or friends.

African women must fight to impose on society the personal choices they have made. It is sad and shocking to know that in some countries, women still not have the right to make that choice; the right to choose their future and to say no to outdated gender roles. Contrary to popular African tradition, we are not all destined to be a mothers or wives. Every woman should be allowed to choose whether she wishes to have a child or get married.

Africa will rise, when women are given a voice. When women are given choices in spite of complications. Perhaps we want to have it all but don’t we deserve it after everything we have done for Mama Africa?

Keep in mind that having it all is possible just not all at once. This doesn’t mean you are not complete, it just means you have to toil a little harder for a little longer.

So come on, let’s go get what belongs to us!